


An Understanding And An Insight

by beneviolent (godofchaos)



Category: Fire Emblem Heroes
Genre: Gen, Grief/Mourning, Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-11
Updated: 2020-12-11
Packaged: 2021-03-11 00:14:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,301
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28005990
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/godofchaos/pseuds/beneviolent
Summary: You summoned Líf and you decided you would be kind to him and try to support him. Written in first person perspective. A short piece on your thoughts and the power of presence.
Relationships: Líf & Summoner | Eclat | Kiran, Líf (Fire Emblem)/Reader
Comments: 2
Kudos: 30





	An Understanding And An Insight

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first publicly published piece in 10 years! Wow. I hope you all don't mind how choppy it is. No beta; I wrote this in one sitting and I'm not afraid to die lmao

When I first summoned Líf, he was surprised. However, he was quick to strangle whatever emotion he was about to express after that and composed himself. Even though we both knew the layout of the castle and the barracks, I felt obliged to show him around. He didn't say much, just quietly walked beside me. I didn't talk his ear off - just walked with him through the usual places. Every so often he would pause and look at his feet. He stared holes into the floors and walls, as if by glaring he could make whatever it was he felt turn tail and leave. I considered saying something, but I wasn't sure what to say. I wasn't sure if he would be alright with my touch either, so instead I just waited for him to finish having his moments of thought. 

After a day or so, he became more comfortable with expressing himself. I don't know what the other heroes may have said to him or if the shock of being pulled back to a place much resembling his past was just starting to fade, but his demeanor had become aggressive and cold. He snapped at me whenever I would ask him how he was faring. 

"If you want to waste time on small talk, seek out Alfonse or Sharena. You have nothing to discuss with me." He always looked away from me. Dismissed me. He was also reluctant when I called him out to train at first. If there is anything I can confidently say about myself, it's that I am pretty stubborn and persistent. I'm not sure if this is a good or bad thing, but everyone says that I am those things, so I am inclined to agree. I worried that I was annoying Líf, so I tried my best to not bother him too often. I still checked up on him every day, of course. Even when he tried to hide behind books in quieter parts of the castle. I know he was avoiding people, but it just felt wrong to let him always be isolated.

He did put his all into battle, however. There was anger in the way that he moved on the battlefield. He was like a wildfire - get too close and you would be burned. I quickly learned to give him space and to plan strategies around knowing how far away I should keep other heroes or to have a cleric nearby if I could not avoid proximity. He clearly put his all into fighting, even if he was not happy about fighting next to others. Eventually I elected to have him fight by his lonesome. He seemed to appreciate it, even if he got grumpy that I called on him at all.

Others asked me often why I bothered. Líf was always very cold and unkind to heroes who tried reaching out to him with camaraderie. I am still working on a better answer to the question, but the best answer I currently have is just, "He seems lonely. No one should be alone like that."

It wasn't until a couple months later that I got up the courage to ask Líf why he was so uncooperative and mean to others. I found him seated with a book in a quiet corner of the library, far from where most people roam. I know he heard me approach him. He opted to stare hard at the book in his hands rather than at me.

"Hey."

"...Yes?"

"I didn't see you around earlier. Figured I would find you here."

"Why are you here." He looked up at me.

"I just wanted to check in on you and see how you are doing?" I shifted my weight from leg to leg under his piercing glare. 

"Really. _That_ is why you came to pester me? You already know my answer. Leave me alone." He looked back at the book in his hands and attempted to return to reading. After a few minutes of me standing there, looking at him and _not_ leaving, he angrily threw his book to the ground and jumped to his feet.

"Can you not see I do not want to talk to you? Can you not see how miserable I am here?! Why do you insist on doing this to me?! " he shouted as he balled his fists. I instinctively took a step back and he quickly straightened his back. He looked uncomfortable at his own outburst.

"I want to understand, that's all." I reached out tentatively. He narrowed his eyes. "You avoid people like the plague and are short with anyone who dares to try to reach out to you. I can't get you to cooperate with others when we are out in the field and I just want to come to some kind of understanding. We can't keep going on like this."

"Well, stop trying. You will never understand me." He moved to turn away.

"I know. But you are clearly hurting and alone and seem to need someone to hear you. I promise I will go after you tell me why you're behaving this way. Please, Líf."

He walked past me and stood at a window, peering outside at the training grounds below. The sun was straddling the hills, casting long shadows on the world. "The others. They do not care for me. They do not want me around. I have overheard what they say."

"Pardon my language, but fuck what everyone says about you." he huffed a little surprised laugh at that, so I continued. "I was the one who summoned you here. Whatever it is they are saying to you and about you won't make me change my mind about having you around."

"I feel as if everyone is trying to steal from me my grief, Kiran. They look at me and they pity me. They tell me to be grateful I have a second chance. They do not like that I am unhappy. They cannot ever take my pain from me; it is mine and mine alone to feel." His eyes were ablaze with a deep frustration and exhaustion which aged his face. "I cannot simply forget what I have gone through. This castle mirrors my own so very much and every second I am reminded of memories I would prefer to forget." 

I nodded and held his hand. He squeezed back gently and we stared at the sunset until darkness settled and I was called away for night patrol. Líf didn't move from the window as I left; opting to continue to stare at the darkened sky in contemplation. I am not sure how long he stayed there and frankly I couldn't blame him.

The next day it was not I who sought him out. He found me late in the afternoon as I was organizing my manuals and explained that he wanted to thank me for my wisdom.

"I am grateful to have someone to confide in. Even if you are not the Kiran from my world, I appreciate you nonetheless."

I furrowed my brow. He could not see my confusion and I did not have the heart to tell him that it was he who had imparted wisdom and not I who made such an insight. Instead, I smiled at him and placed a hand on his shoulder.

"For you, I am always willing to lend my ear." He tilted his head and smiled with his eyes. I cannot recall when it was that I last saw him ever smile that way, but it was a very good sign.

I hope that he eventually finds peace. For the time being, I’m happy he was able to find some comfort and that I can be around to help him on his journey through grief.

**Author's Note:**

> I love the sad man....
> 
> let me know if you guys would be interested in me expanding on this at some point


End file.
